Wednesday, 26 February 2014

My Last letter : A story of a girl

Today, fifteen years later , I am writing this letter to you , with a bottle of pesticide kept right in front of my eyes. My husband is a pesticide engineer . I had never thought that this pesticide would ever be used to serve this purpose but its the need of the time .

Like most of the girls in our civilized Indian society I too , was warned to be careful about the immoral behavior of our metropolitan cities , when I moved out of my parents care to complete my graduation . As I belonged to a very conservative family , so from very small age I was told not to talk with unknown people . Anyways , in the new city the college was good and I made friends with a number of girls. Even they too , warned me to play safe on that new stage of life and specifically to boys .
One bright day , while parking my scooty at the college gate , the handle just slipped off my soft palms , but never the soon a pair of strong hand helped me out. As I was a bit aware of boys in the college , I said thanks and avoided any further conversation . Every thing on earth was going well before I lost my library card , just to be found by that guy and soon thereafter , we became good friends . In no time rumors spread about us but I ignored the illogical talks going around . One fine day , on his birthday he asked me to company him for dinner and later , we regularly met for coffee . Every thing was fine and I was careful as I was told by my parents . They warned me to be aware of unknown people but now he was not an unknown anymore , so I need not be that careful . Time went on its pace and we became best friends . Later in the final year , he became the leader of a student party of our college , so being a friend of such a guy made me feel even more proud . And after the elections he was chosen as the student president of the college . On that occasion he was gifted a new bike by his father and he asked me take a ride with him around the college . I told him for that he need to wait for me until the college gets empty , near the college gate. But I forgot even though the students were not there still the guards were on their duty as well , and there they saw me riding with him.That particular day , details of the episode of my pillion ride on my friends bike reached to my home before me . I just went pale seeing my parents furiously waiting for me . My father's anger made my love fade away in no time .

After that day I told him to avoid any possible way to contact with me . Later also , he tried many times but I ignored . He not been able to overcome this trauma , became an alcoholic . I was in touch with what was happening to him , but still I avoided him . And then , on the last day of college , through one of his friend he asked me to meet for the one last time to meet him . I went to the place where he called me .
I was in a shear stress and shock after seeing his condition . I totally blamed myself for whatever happened to him . Feeling pathetic for what I had done to him and being unable to control my tears , I just broke away into his arms in that lonely hall of the house . He supported me to let me not feel sorry for what I had done....

I had been married since 15 years . I am writing this letter to you , with a bottle of pesticide kept right in front of my eyes.
My husband is a pesticide engineer . He is a very caring and loving person. We have a thirteen year old son who too is as intelligent as his dad . He was challenged by his dad to secure first position in class to get a computer and that naughty son of mine overcame his dad's challenge to get the computer . I was not much aware of computer but my son tried to help me out in every possible way.
One day , suddenly my son came running furiously to take me to his computer . I had sensed what should have happened . With the bless of social networking media my fifteen year old pictures were being shared on the internet . The photos of my last meeting with him . The photos , which were taken as a memory of our love . Those photos which became an object of fun and amusement on internet . People on the internet , saw my skin but remain untouched with my moistened eyes . They enjoyed my cloth-less body with him but were unaware of mental pain . He , who took those picture to have some best memory of us , played havoc to my life , years after . Whole society stood against me but my husband always held my hand to support me in every possible way .

Now, I am writing this letter to you for the last time and it might be possible that you are reading any letter for the last time . As I have informed the cyber police and they will get hold on you very soon . Those people are one of the most toughest people to deal with . They are very brutal and torture like animals .
Till the time you are left with , don't put much stress on your little brain . You should now , try to protect the honor of your family . So , before police arrives at your place , drink the pesticide I am sending you with this last letter.
bye bye..!!
With love..

Saturday, 15 February 2014

The Proposal: Discovering Love!

I was an all time single guy before felling in love with her. Social networking, is really acting like a linking path between two unknown people, who might have never been able to meet if these social sites never existed. Like every usual day, there was nothing exciting going on my life. I loved my life the way it was. It had been a long time when my heart was betrayed and I was left with a void, deep in my heart. Since then, I used to avoid any further involvement of my heart in any matter. I allowed my brain to work upon it logically rather than getting emotional because of my heart. That was the secret of my new found world.. only my world!
No sooner, I became strong enough to tackle any problem logically than dealing with it emotionally.
Enjoying years in a faithful company of myself, I understood the difference between what I was and what I am.
Every single part inside me was healing but still the void, created years back remained intact.
It was not before, by luck or chance or may be because God wanted this, I found her and soon felt that the void was degrading, and my heart was healing.
I am a guy, who loves to make friends with different people and to know about them, a person, hungry for experiences from others and always love to interact with other, no matter whether online or offline. But I never guessed that something that special was inked by the Almighty. Till date, I don't know why, but still as Someone has said that a second is enough to judge a person, and her flaunt-less way of expression directly knocked my heart down, and I wrote " Hi!" to her. Since then, the curiosity to know each other rose a new height each day. The frequency of words being exchanged increased day by day, even though she warned me about the magnitude of talks between us but still, we both were unable to hold on. It was like, we discovered the real friend in each other for whom we were in search of. Any relation is based on trust, understanding and care, and we both were finding this in each other. Sharing our happiness and sorrow made our bond even stronger. It was like telling our own self and knowing ourselves even much better while talking to one another.  With time our friendship was growing up. As we trusted and believed over each other, closeness was usual and dependence was natural. Both of us never wished any commitment as we both had our own unfortunate past. Still, I found myself falling for her. Even though she never said, Still, I knew she was also falling for me.
I was very confused about her. My heart and my mind reciprocated totally opposite answers. I was not sure if it was right time but then, I finally decided to follow my heart and make proposal rather than waiting for her to express her feelings.
We both were keen to meet each other so we planned our meeting at a well known place. That day, I was a bit anxious. Seeing her coming, was like finding peace for my soul. And with a shear approach, I invited her to sit at a corner table near the glass door. We had a good amount of conversation over our lunch. As the time of separation was coming near by, I was finding an exponential increase in my heart beat yet, I was calm and positioned. Now the time had come when I had to propose. She always wished to have a proposal over phone call ( I know its kinda weird.. but..yes.. it was..! ) still I insisted on Face to Face proposal. While under going through mental confusion, I just excused and went out through the glass door. I was still confused how to say and what to say. Then, I got an idea. I waved towards her through the door and I called her ( she was just like.. why the hell I was calling from outside the glass door..). In no time she picked up my call. I, after a minute pause, said to her that I had never said before to any any girl, while looking straight into her eyes, over that phone call," Will you be the love of my life? ". I, for a moment, just went senseless. As if every little thing has paused except her breath which I could hear through phone while looking straight into her eyes. Her face turned pale, I felt as if I did something that I shouldn't have done otherwise. I, still having phone near my ear, was controlling my emotions from over powering me and then with each passing second I found her shadowy sparkling eyes getting brighten up and then I heard,"Yes, I will!" in a low frequency.

Saturday, 1 February 2014

Unconcerned Middle-class !!

"Could you please provide us with some space to sit ?"
"Sorry old man! I am, myself not able to properly sit on this seat."- replied a man , who was comfortably sitting on the corner seat. 
The old man's sunken eyes were unable to find any place to sit. Finally , he decided to sit on the floor with his son. I don't know why , but his cracked  wavery voice caught my attention. While the old man was adjusting his little luggage , his son was just staring at him as if he wasn't knowing what his father was doing . Suddenly , from no where a women entered the train compartment and began investigating if the old man and his son were settled or not. I was a bit amazed while she was talking to his son , who was in his mid twenties, in some kind of sign language and with mixture of some words. Later , I configured out that the boy was intellectually disabled i.e.mentally retarded. I felt quite sympathetic for the boy and of course for the old man. Nevertheless the train , with a jolt , started moving. The women who appeared overwhelmed in-front of old man and his son , bade good bye to both and left. While she was leaving , I noticed her moistened eyes which she tried to hide from both and she even succeeded. After such a huge annoying disturbance , I finally observed some rest in the air.
The old man , preoccupied in his place kept observing the compartment and the people around him as if he was travelling for the first time. With his clothes, anyone can predict that he might belong to not so rich lower middle class family . His son appeared very much curious about the things happening around and got his doubt resolved by his father in some sign language. For the time being they both became the center of attraction among the people present there.
Beggars are part and parcel of the Indian Railways. It was nothing new , that I was seeing there at that moment but still there was something which made me feel ashamed . Usually ,we , the middle class people , as and when observe a beggar approaching us, we get busy watching outside the window or get occupied with some other things , that most of the people were doing at that time.But, unlike all other people, that old man took out coins from his pocket ,which was all that he had with him as his entire wealth, and gave one of the coin to the beggar.
That was the time that made me to realize that with increasing literacy and living standards their is an exponential decrease in An Ideal Human behavior and cause is still unknown to me . We , with the time , are becoming more selfish and becoming feeling less for other people .   
With the next halt , I arrived at my station and left my train.

courtesy: Daksh Shrotriya