Thursday, 23 January 2014

Growing Up !

Here I am , soon leaving behind my teen age group to add one more to the adult beings. Many of us already are a part of this group , some would be joining with me and others in some short period of time. But the fact is, that every growing being is going be a part of this age group sooner or later. The time slipped away at a much pace than I expected. I never thought it would be this much painful to be called an adult but yes it is. In my , childhood days I wondered how great it would feel to be an adult where no one is monitoring  your movement , where you are the in-charge of your life: the captain of your ship. But , today nothing is  happening as I used to fantasize about.
Today , after breathing nineteen springs , I am only left with some crooked past , multiple falls , some heart breaks , few longing friendships , many separations and a heavy heart with a burdened soul. I am not a pessimistic but all I seeked for , was absorbed from me to some lone place where I could never get. There were moments of achievements also , but they fell short enough to overcome this mental trauma.
Remembering into the past days , a blurred image of a boy appears ,who was as free as wind and did whatever he liked to. He was physically under control but mentally untamed. He found every little happiness in his mother's lap and security by his father. Playing had been his favorite hobby as he had no distraction other than finding a good place to play with his friends. All he did was enjoying and relaxing all the time , as he believed that his parents are always there for him. And yes they were , but there strength and body were not. They, who were observing a careless boy becoming a young man , were ignoring that they too were getting old. The small boy who otherwise , would have even conquered the world , was going under mighty changes.He realized the truth and what his ignorance in the past has cost him in the present.

The boy who wished to become an adult as early possible , now , when is just few steps away , is trying to go back into the time and cancel that wish. He who wished to be free and alone , now wants to get his mother's company . He who wished to be free from any kind of monitoring , wants to be under the eyes of his father . He who wished to eat at restaurants , is missing the food cooked by his mother. He who wished to become an adult , is now missing his childhood. He who wished to live is ceased to "exist" . Growing up is exciting. But , in a haste of growing , ignoring various little happiness coming in our way , can become a life long curse.
'Time once spent is gone forever'. Consider its importance seriously. Live each and every moment with joy . We are lucky enough to have this life then why to waste precious time in weeping .
We should try to be happy as we all took birth and we all are in a journey , together , some a little forward and some a bit behind , but something is common , we all are changing , we are growing.. we all are "growing up"!! 

Tuesday, 21 January 2014

Poem: Saving you!

I am confused
whether to or not..
respect my mind
or go apart!
whatever it say
should I accept..
or let my destiny rule
with some respect!
I was never wrong
still I can apologize..
to keep things right
I can pay myself as a sacrifice!
all that i could
i did to protect..
and tried to tell
from the every aspect!
its just play of words
all that took..
to make me odd
and make me shook!
thousands of words..
that I didn't say
was later misunderstood..
and later I had to pay!

Thursday, 16 January 2014

Departure:A Realized journey

Finally I was there , sitting all alone on my berth in the train , with some never seen faces at Lucknow Railway Station . The train was as still as mountains while my thoughts were equally unstable . Fighting those thoughts of uneven feeling , I somehow managed to find sleep .

It had not been a long time since I slept , when with a hush of the wind over my face and a sudden jerk , on that cool winter evening , I was brought back from some unfathomable thought to the practical world . A blinding flash of how I was forced by time to bid good bye to my parents , moistened my eyes .
Just few days back after spending a great deal of time in my college I went back to my home for the winter break . Returning back home was some thing of real excitement and coming back was an equally devastating feeling inside.
As the train paced up, my mind paced down. I felt some weird stillness in my head. Looking out the train window with my moist eyes I kept observing different trees, houses, lakes, animals and every possible thing in my view, were going away from me as if they were never to return (of course.. they won't i.e their condition at that time won't be same again!).
I realized that every disappearing scene from my range of view was very similar to each passing moment of my precious life.Each and every creation of nature which a while ago appeared to me as a mere worthless thing were suddenly personified to something of immense importance.The insignificant shrubs, grass, trees appeared like the in numerous  people we meet, and leave and forget while we are on our journey.They come for some certain reasons and leave as soon as they are done.The beautiful green fields and vast stretches of fertile mother Earth represented our relatives that bring freshness and a new excitement to our life.They stay in our memory for a respectable time period.While carrying on with my journey on train I came across some really lovely lakes, fast flowing rivers, long bridges, thundering tunnels and other things which we are not able to forget easily.These memorable roles are played by our dear friends.They are the real source of joy, fun , amusement and a healthy life.
That whole evening I was thinking and comparing every noticed object to some or the other person. In all this I was still unable to find something to compare my parents and then I realized the infinite cover underneath I was traveling. That infinite stretch of sky was representation of love and care of my parents to protect and bring comfort to me.Throughout the journey every nearest and dearest thing left me.. some earlier.. some a bit later but there were somethings which were always with me even though sometimes I didn't noticed. While every creation was leaving me the Moon and the Stars were there with me throughout the journey even though they disappeared to me in morning but they were still there like our parents stay with us in every situation even when every other single being we love leaves.I was finally satisfied that I will never be alone.
With a hope that I was being guided and cared by parents if not directly then indirectly, I felt asleep and with the first rays of the sun I reached my college , astonishingly , not with low feelings of leaving my parents but with confidence of having them by me always!!